“Now God has us where he wants us, with all the time in this world and the next to shower grace and kindness upon us in Christ Jesus. Saving is all his idea, and all his work. All we do is trust him enough to let him do it. It’s God’s gift from start to finish! We don’t play the major role. If we did, we’d probably go around bragging that we’d done the whole thing! No, we neither make nor save ourselves. God does both the making and saving. He creates each of us by Christ Jesus to join him in the work he does, the good work he has gotten ready for us to do, work we had better be doing.” - Ephesians 2:7-10 MSG
I think it’s important to start this off with the scriptures above. God allowed me to see another year. I’ve realized the older I get, the less I like celebrating my birthday. But this year was different for more reasons than one. I’ve always expressed how I suffered from depression when I was initially diagnosed with endometriosis. However this time around, my feelings was different. I found myself in deep moments of sadness merely because of the nature of where my heart relies. We all experience things in life that really make us ask the “what are you going to do?” question. But it seemed like occasional questions turned into daily for me and I really started to ponder on everything.
As I was pondering, I started realizing His goodness and mercy. Because after all there are things that I talked to him about YEARS ago that in 2022 He’s fulfilling. As if He didn’t already know that that’s what He was going to do! I also realized that I was so focused on what’s next; rather fixing things way out of my control that I lose sight of what’s now. My heart is so immense that when it’s fractured, I focus on the part that needs to heal and I do not see the areas that’s whole. It’s in the areas that are whole which will allow the other areas to be made new.
I’m a work in progress. I’m human. I make mistakes. Forever developing and evolving. I know Ephesians 2:7-10 were placed on my heart as indication that He has me exactly where He wants me to be; in His hands.
For anyone reading this, know that everything happens in His time so it’s best to align your time with His. Xoxo
EST: 4.12.1985
